


Eternity

by WhatTheWentz



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Crying, F/M, Grief/Mourning, How Do I Tag, Missing Scene, Peter Quill Feels, Spoilers for GOTG Vol 2, i am sad, like a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-09 06:30:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11098845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhatTheWentz/pseuds/WhatTheWentz
Summary: Obligatory missing scene fic from GOTG Vol 2 where the rest of the Guardians find Quill after all that has happened with Ego and Yondu.





	Eternity

**Author's Note:**

> So I've watched this movie about four times now and have two fics (including this one) that I came up with.
> 
> the second fic is a starkquill fic where Tony takes Peter to visit his mom's grave on Earth (if you want me to upload this fic, tell me)
> 
> Anyway, this movie filled me with so many emotions and although I was never particularly a Yondu fan, I got super emotional at his death and had to write something.
> 
> This is my first GOTG fic, so excuse any shitty characterisation.

An irritated Gamora rubbed her aching head as she got to her feet, hissing at Rocket, “You shot me.”   
  


“I had to.” the raccoon replied, “It all worked out though, didn’t it?  Quill’s alive!”

 

She huffed, “That’s not the point.” and then she headed down to check on Peter, whom they had just rescued, stopping dead in her tracks when she saw him.

 

He was knelt on the floor, his face buried into someone’s chest as his body heaved with sobs.  Gamora thought for a second that it was Ego, that some form of physical body of his had survived and that was whom the Terran was mourning, but when she stepped closer, she saw a bright mass of icicle-covered blue skin, and she drew a rugged gasp, realising who the cadaver was.

 

Yondu.

 

His eyes were glazed over, his lips parted slightly in a gasp and Gamora couldn’t help but imagine him taking his final breath, how painful it would’ve been to witness.

 

Peter’s sobs got louder, and he shakily fumbled to remove the space suit attached to him, but to no avail due to his trembling hands.

 

“Quill…” Rocket’s voice whispered shakily, guilt filling his tone.

 

The assassin looked behind her and saw that the others had filed downstairs too and she noticed that Groot had also begun to cry, unable to comprehend what was happening through his innocence.  All he knew was Peter, who he cared about, was sad and the man who had affectionately called him ‘twig’ was lying frozen and unmoving.

 

Gamora moved to kneel beside Peter, who was still trying to frantically remove the suit.  Wordlessly, she reached out and removed it for him, causing him to look up at her, his breath trembling.

 

“H-He can’t be--” he choked, then bowed his head, sniffling.

 

Finally, Gamora managed to speak past the lump in her throat and she rested a hand on his back, “Peter… I’m so sorry.”

 

“He c-can’t be dead.” Peter was in complete denial, and he pulled his knees up to his chest, crying harder.

 

They all sat there for a couple of minutes until Drax suggested, “We need to deal with the body.”   
  


_ “What?”  _ Peter shrieked, horrified, “He’s not j-just a body!  He’s my dad!”   
  


Oblivious, Drax tilted his head and asked, “I thought Ego was your father?”

 

This seemed to enrage Peter, who clambered to his feet and screamed at Drax,  _ “It’s a metaphor, you dense fuck!  God, you’re so stupid!” _ __  
  


“Peter.” Gamora sighed in warning, getting up and resting a hand on his shoulder, “He’s right.  We can’t just leave him here.  So calm down.”   
  


He pulled away from her and snarled, “Fuck you.” he looked to the rest of the crew, “Fuck all of you.  I’m not moving him.  He’ll be okay, I just gotta--”   
  


“Peter, he’s  _ dead!”  _ Gamora yelled, and that seemed to break through to him, causing him to look at her, teary-eyed and wounded.

 

He backed into the wall and slid down, gently sobbing and whispering, “I’m sorry.”   
  
Mantis, who seemed to still be dazed after hitting her head, offered, “I can help, if you want.” she reached out her hand and touched his cheek, only to promptly burst into tears as soon as she linked emotions with the Terran.

 

Such grief, such pain.  She had felt Drax’s agony earlier, but compared to this fresh, new pain, it had felt so distant.  This agony was closer, realer, and she couldn’t find it within herself to drain it away.  It would only return, stronger and harder to deal with.

 

“I am sorry.” she gasped out, tears rolling down her cheeks.  She knelt down in front of him and pulled him into a motherly embrace, hearing him reluctantly hold back the muffled sobs.

 

He didn’t feel comfortable with everyone seeing him like this.  All he wanted was to go and hide and cry on his own, but here he was, in the view of all his friends (and even one of his enemies, he noted as he looked at Nebula).

 

Kraglin got to his knees beside Yondu’s body and reached to close his eyes, wincing at the crunching noise the ice made.  He had lost so many friends in the past couple of days that he was swept up in an uncontrollable wave of grief and yet, he couldn’t even imagine what Quill was going through.

 

Mantis ran her fingers through Peter’s hair, resting her chin atop his head, “It is okay.” she whispered, “You’re safe.”   
  


Peter pulled away and shook his head, “I can’t do this.”

 

He hopped to his feet and ran, ran through the ship aimlessly until he finally collapsed with exhaustion onto the ground in one of the corridors.  He dragged his limbs until he was sitting up against the wall and proceeded to bawl into his hands like a child.

 

He could almost hear Yondu’s voice berating him,  _ ‘What’cha doin’ cryin’, boy?  Grow up, be a man!’ _

 

Part of him hated the blue alien for dying, whilst another part would’ve done anything to bring him back.  The cries escaping him were loud, painfully so, and he attempted to muffle them but couldn’t.

 

A patter of feet caught his attention and then he felt something tug his trouser leg and looked down to see Groot, who still had a look of innocence upon his face.  He had no clue what was happening and yet still had followed Quill in an attempt to comfort him.

 

_ “I am Groot?”  _ he pondered, reaching out a wooden hand to rest on Quill’s knee.

 

Quill wasn’t quite able to make out what he was saying yet still struggled to explain, “I-It’s Yondu… h-he’s--”

 

_ Dead.  Gone.  ‘In Heaven’. _

 

Why was it so hard say the words?  They were like poison and every time Peter attempted to phrase it, he felt like throwing up.

 

He was trembling hard, like he had been in the freezing cold for days.  He had been floating around in space clutching to Yondu’s corpse for half an hour at the most, but it had felt like months.   It had felt like each breath had stretched to an eternity.

 

_ I see it.  Eternity. _

 

Ego had won.

 

Yes, his master plan had failed but somehow he had still managed to take from Peter the things he loved most; his mom, Yondu, the dreams he had about meeting his real father.  It had all been a nightmare, one he wished he could wake up from.

 

All of Ego’s children, he sensed them; his siblings, all being murdered.

 

It broke his heart and made him feel like he was the one who deserved to die instead.  Yondu had sacrificed himself for him, had apologised for past misdeeds and then died and now all that was left was this searing agony that ripped through Peter’s chest.

 

It was a familiar kind of pain, the exact same feeling he had on the day he watched his mother flatline.  Just as he regretted not taking his mom’s hand, he regretted not realising sooner that Ego had been manipulating him or that Yondu had been a father figure all along.

 

_ Stupid, stupid! _

 

When Gamora joined them on the floor, Quill barely reacted, simply sat between her and Groot, choking out his grief.

 

After a few moments, he shuffled to rest his head in her lap and she immediately responded, moving to run her fingers through his hair gently.   She understood the pain he felt, having been raised by Thanos, a true monster, and having her home and family destroyed.

 

Groot came over beside her then clambered up onto her shoulder, looking down at the grief-stricken Quill with wide, sad eyes.

 

Minutes, maybe even hours passed and Quill finally stopped sobbing and opted to just lie there, allowing Gamora to comfort him.  He hated being coddled, always had but right now all he wanted was to be held.

 

He wanted them back; Yondu, his mom.

 

It just wasn’t fair that in defeating an evil such as Ego, he had lost them both too.  Ego had loved his mother genuinely (at least, he claimed he did) and he had easily condemned her to death.  Yondu had saved him, but at such a terrible cost.

 

“I’m so sorry, Peter.” Gamora finally spoke, her voice barely a mumble.

 

Peter sniffled, “It’s not your fault.”   
  


“It’s not yours either.” she whispered.

 

He sighed shakily, “I should’ve known.  I should’ve fucking--”   
  


“You couldn’t have.” she said.

 

He lifted his head up and shuffled to sit up as he reminded her,  _ “You knew.   _ You sensed something was wrong and I was a jerk about it.”

 

“You wanted to believe he was really the father you wanted.” she mumbled, taking his hand, “You’re not a bad person for that.  You’re human.”

 

He shook his head, “I’m  _ half- _ human.  And because I let my guard down, the entire universe was almost destroyed.  Yondu’s dead.  And the only thing I have left of my mom is broken.  I don’t even have memories anymore, they’re ruined.”

 

“How?” Gamora asked, concerned.

 

He explained, “Ego… the son of a bitch, he killed her.  Put the tumor in her head and killed her.”

 

“Peter…” she gasped, horrified.

 

Groot piped up, “I am Groot.”

 

What he said was something along the lines of  _ ‘that’s fucked up’,  _ Peter figured.  Or maybe he was simply mindlessly babbling like a child would, and Quill was simply projecting.

 

He figured it was the latter.

 

“I hate him.” Quill grit out and pulled his hand away from Gamora’s to clench his fist at his side, “I just-- I fucking  _ hate  _ him.  So, so much.  You know my mom used to say I was like him?  That I acted like him, that I looked like him.”

 

Gamora noticed that he was starting to freak out, so cupped his face between her hands, ”You’re not.  You’re nothing like him.  He’s a monster, but you?  You’re a good person.  You’ve saved the galaxy.  You’re a hero.”   
  


“I-I just…” Peter began, then swallowed harshly, “I hate him so much.”

 

She held back her own emotions to state, “I know.” then pulled him into a hug, slightly displacing Groot, who moved to try and give both of them an embrace, but being too small to do so.

 

*

  
Yondu’s funeral was a day later, letting Quill get into the right state of mind before he could properly mourn.  He was no longer in denial, but was still terrified to go and face Yondu’s body, as if he was somehow going to come back to life and say he hated him.

 

“You ready?” Gamora asked, catching his attention.

 

He looked up at the doorway to see her standing there and inhaled sharply, “Not really, but I don’t got much of a choice, do I?”

 

“Peter…” she began.

 

He cut her off as he got to his feet, “I’ll be fine.”

 

That, of course, was a lie, but he had to try and keep up some form of pretense to stop him from breaking down over Yondu’s body once again.

 

They headed into the room where Yondu’s body was being prepared and Peter exhaled before mustering up the strength to speak.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos/Reviews are always welcome!!!
> 
> also come scream about this movie with me:
> 
>  
> 
> [my tumblr (sapphicfreyamikaelson)](https://sapphicfreyamikaelson.tumblr.com)  
> [my twitter (buffyquake)](https://twitter.com/buffyquake)


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